Monday, June 27, 2016

Ed Burnett Day Camp Hot Dogs by Doug Burnett

Edited for spelling only.

  1. Buy the cheapest brand of hot dogs available. (Preferably those made from unidentifiable turkey parts, should say "enhanced beef flavor" somewhere on the package.)
  2. Buy the cheapest hot dog buns possible, day old isn't good enough, try the week old shelf or better yet go out to the dumpster behind Safeway and see whats available.
  3. Make sure when you pack the car with all the fishing gear that you place as much of it as possible (especially any foul bait) on top of the grocery bags.
  4. Be sure that at least one jug of cool-aid, can of beer, or little brother leaks on the packages of buns.
  5. When you get to the fishing hole, place the buns and hot dogs on a big hot rock so the buns can dry and the bacteria content in the hot dogs will become sufficient.
  6. Now cook the hot dogs with a traffic flare to get that yummy sulphur and phosphorus essence.
  7. Now wash them down with warm cool-aid or Schmitt animal beer. 
  8. Get more beer damn it!


  1. You forgot the mandatory sand seasoning when the slightly inebriated chef trips over a sleeping dog and dumps the entire tray of dogs onto the beach.

  2. I can still feel the grit when we cooked hot dogs on the beach. No matter how careful we were, there was always sand on the hot dogs.

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